When the FINE ladies IGNORED me!

It was the beginning of a new academic year and I was on my way to withdraw some money from the bank at Commercial Area. Those who have been to KNUST know the place.

I was crossing the street to where the banks were, when three nicely-dressed, smart-looking ladies started racing towards me. That part did not amaze me like the pleasant smiles that beamed from their faces.

I was surprised. I felt very important. What did I do so right? A quick glance behind them got me answered. They were from the desks where students come to pay school fees. They were bank representatives wooing students to pay fees at their respective banks.

Still, they kept approaching me gallantly. I started smiling too, when one looked me in the eye and offered me a gentle “Hello!” I hated to burst their bubbles, but I had no option than to disappoint them because I was not coming there to pay for tuition. “I have paid my fees already,” I said with a smile.

Suddenly, the entire atmosphere changed. The look on their faces changed in one moment like a wallpaper, and their fast paces were halted like a car braking from a top speed. My smile vanished instantly. It seemed like even the sunshine darkened at once.

They turned and walked away without another word. They ignored me like I was not there anymore. Hardly had I seen people switch between two distinct emotions so rapidly.

It has been about 3 years after the incident, but just last week it returned to my thoughts and yes, with its accompanying lessons.


1. In life, guys, never be moved by a lady’s smile, especially near a bank. Haha…just kidding. Let’s get real…

1. In life, nobody truly wants us just for who we are. (Well, except God)

Yes, it does sound too generalized, but it is actually true. You can ask the mad man on the street. He never even gets a greeting. People respect us, like us and honor us because of what we have that they either admire or want.

We are all guilty of it.

In fact, one of the greatest tips for self-growth is to change one’s circle of friends. Put another way, choose only those who have what you want, so you can get a piece of their lives. Worse, the advice continues: ignore friends who don’t have what you need, who are not helpful, and who draw you back.

See, the ladies were not being mean. They were exhibiting a universal life principle. We are only wanted because of what we possess.

2. If we want something/someone to want us, we must get what the thing/person wants.

Too many of us pursue our desires the wrong way. We think we can get what we want by simply going directly for it. It is a stressful way of getting anything. The simplest way is to get what will attract what we want.

It would be stressful attempting to force the smiles out of the ladies. Yet, if I had what they wanted-the fees-they would freely offer me more smiles.

Growth-minded employers want to see certain qualities and skills. The simplest way to be wanted by the employer is to get the skills and soft skills.

If you want someone to love you, don’t force them. Simply do what they love to experience. Gary Chapman calls it, exhibiting the person’s love language.

That is why Isaiah 60:3 says, nations will come (not to you) to your light, and their kings to the brightness of your rising. In other words, no nations want you. No kings want you. However, if you just happen to get light and brightness of rising, they will chase after you.

3. If you don’t want something in your life, get what it cannot stand. And it will leave!

My fine ladies could not stand the fact that I was not coming to pay my fees, so they fled from me.

Nobody worries themselves sacking mosquitoes from their rooms. All they need is a repellant. The insects can’t stand it and so they leave.

In Conclusion

Everything we wish to get rid of in our lives, has its corresponding repellent. Similarly, everything we wish to have in our lives has its corresponding attractant.

We just need to know when to use which. Lesson learned!

This is only one of the many real life inspirational messages in the Facebook Group, What Life Just Taught Me. Join us for a life-changing experience.

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